Day 6 - Clutter Challenge

I am loving the clutter challenge and the closer I get to February the more excited I am to keep going. 5 things a day is really much much easier than I thought it would be!

So to continue....

26 - Little Board Book (donating it to playgroup)

27 - A phone (hopefully someone will buy it.)

28 - A Calendar for 2010. (free-cycle)

29 - A Thomas Jefferson Education. (give it back to my girlfriend)

30 - A Mothering Magazine (donating it to friends)

As this is New Years Eve my intention (because no one keeps resolutions) is to keep getting rid of 5 things a day until my house is clutter free.

Wish me luck!

Day 5 - Clutter Challenge

I made it! I am totally caught up. It took me a little but I have made it to 25 pieces of clutter!

The List for Today

21 - Night Light

22 - Lanolin Cream, I have way too much of this stuff.

23 - Dog Harness. Not sure what to do with this....

24 - A cloth bag. Donate it to goodwill?

25 - A stuffed teddy. (did I mention how much I can't stand teddies?)

It feels so great to have started the de-clutter process. It is just amazing how we are so bogged down by all the clutter that we acquire.

Day 4 - Clutter Challenge

Back to the Clutter Challenge. This is awesome! I have never felt so motivated and my house is getting cleaner room-by-room...the best part is that my kids and husband are joining in now too!

So, the list.

16 - Leather Pants. They will never fit me again. I am hoping to sell them and get a little cash and some space at the same time!

17 - 5 pairs of Children's socks. We got many pairs for Christmas, so I decided to get rid of the ones that I can't stand, that never stay on, or are just plain ugly.

18 - Baby Name Book. Will pass it on to a new mom.

19 - Going to Bed book. I had 2 copies.

20 - Siblings without Rilvary book. Needs to go back to it's original owner. :)

And yes, I have more, so there will be another post today...but then I am all caught up!!

Decisions

I am at a cross-roads. I feel like someone is trying to shove me off of a pirate plank and into the water. I feel like I am being forced to make decisions, and in-decisiveness is more my style. Not saying that is a good thing, just that I get panic attacks when *I* actually have to make a decision. Like my dog. I wanted her too, but had to make my husband make the Final decision to get her, and this house, and to get married. (my heart was pounding insane when he asked me, as I was so afraid to make the choice....not that I didn't want to be his wife, I did. I just didn't want to have to be the one to say yes.)

And now, school. Yes, it rears it's ugly head once more. My son will be 5 in may. So in order for him to be able to go to kindergarten next year he needs to be registered by the end of next month...actually, the 11th of January...so like 13 days away.

I go back and forth on this. On the one hand, my parents, in-laws, and husband are right...you can't say that something doesn't work or is fundamentally flawed until you give it a try. On the other hand, why would I want my son to be a guinea pig?

I have friends that have their children in public school and they thrive. I have friends who homeschool and their kids are amazing! I have a friend who uses the blended program (which i am most interested in, and her kids seem pretty well adjusted....) I just can't decide. It's not helpful that I get into a yelling match with my husband every time we talk about it. He thinks I am irrational...I don't think he sees my side because his mom worked in the school system her whole career. So, I would say, that is a little biased, isn't it?

So, what is my worry...lets lay it out on the table.

My son is bright. Yea, yea, yea...every kid is gifted. (or at least every mom thinks her kid is.) I have to say that I am not making it up, my second son is no where near the intellectual capabilities that my first son had at his age. (the same can be said about the second and his physical attributes.) My son was talking by 9 months. Sentences. He has an incredible memory, he asks WHY all the time, he experiments, he can do simple math, count to 20, the alphabet is down pat...he is 4. He is also incredibly active. He likes to run, jump, bounce, climb, yell, interrupt, etc. He is sensitive, empathetic, and above all else a gentle soul. (to everyone other than his brother.)

My fear is that I will put him in school, and he will be forced into this little box that doesn't fit. That he will be made to conform and his little soul will be broken. (I am not afraid of the peer group, bullies and the like, as he can stand up for himself.) It is the adults and the parents at the school that I have no control over.

I fear that he will be made to sit, to learn not to interrupt, to not ask questions, etc. To beat the intrinsic nature of learning out of his system. When he knows the answer and the teacher does not call on him, he is crushed. How many times does one need to be crushed before they stop trying all together?

My fear is that he will be labeled ADD and left to sit in a corner for some grade 6 student to teach him how to read, because the teacher can not be bothered to work with the kids that need more help, or seem like they are unruly. That she will focus on the little girls that sit so nice and colour within the lines.

My fear is that if I kept him at home he would learn nothing. That he would be a social outcast, that he would not be successful in jr.high or high school. That he would never go to university and that I wasted all that potential.

Mostly, my fear is that I am going to do something wrong. (I also feel alone in this decision.)


**Update for September 2012. We are still homeschooling and it was the best decision that we EVER made. He is flourishing and learning at such an excellerated pace. He is really doing better than I could have ever imagined. Listen to your guts mamas! You know your children best.**

Day 3 - Clutter Challenge.

What? 3 posts in one day? I haven't even got to my actual post of the day yet! Still playing catch-up so I am almost there... :)

Here's the List

11 - GLO Stick (un-opened)

12 - Pager. (returning it where it needs to go)

13 - Breast-feeding Bracelet

14 - Broken Necklaces and Earrings. (this was a wonderful thing that really needed to be done, my jewelry box looks fabulous.)

15 - Nursing Cream

I have 2 more sets of 10 until I am caught up, but think that it should wait until the morning, when I can actually get into my kids rooms!!!

Day 2 - Clutter Challenge

So I am still technically on Day 1, but I started late so I am playing catch-up for a few days. I am suprised at how easy it is for me to find 5 things a day...it's actually easier to find 10 or 12 and my house is looking so nice, because I organize as I go about the challenge.

Here is the list of my next 5.

6 - Stack of old paintchips. (why we keep these? who knows? we want to paint, but never have the time or the money to do so.)

7 - Broken Nutcracker. (Didn't make it past Christmas with a two year old...poor guy.)

8 - Organic Ginger Aid Tea. (I am going to send this to my cousin who is expecting.)

9 - Confessions of a Naughty Mommy. (I am planning on taking this book to a Used Book Store...unless someone wants it...anyone?)

10 - Canadian Small Business Kit for Dummies. (Again, to a Used Book Store.)

Keep an eye out for my next post, coming in like 2 seconds..... lol

Day 1 - Clutter Challenge.

I signed up for the Mothering Dot Commune Clutter Challenge. It's From December 26th to February 1st. The whole premise is that you need to find 5 things a day to get out of your house, and trash doesn't count. :)

(Unless it's stuff like old earrings that needed to be trashed.)

I got to a slow start but am up to 5 items as of yesterday. I am going to post the items here just so I can keep motivated. (but will continue to post regular blog posts as I can...)

I need to decide on what I would like as a reward at the end...any suggestions??

The List

1. An Elephant Stuffie

2. A Broken Kids Clock

3. A Play Drill

4. A bag of gDiapers, looking to sell, but will cosign or freecycle if need be.

5. A whole host of old medications. This was actually a long time in coming, I had way too many expired etc. and was able to put them away properly.

All in all, a good start!

I Don't Understand You.

I bought a book today on how to raise boys. My mom gave me crap and said that "You don't need to read a book on raising boys, you just do it!" She is right, I know...always right. But, a part of me still wants to see what this author will tell me.

I feel that when you have a girl, and totally correct me if I am wrong, that you can level with her to a point. You may get frustrated and argue, but you understand where she is coming from because you both think in the same way.

I don't think like a boy. Not to be too simplistic, or cliche, but I dont understand why farts are so funny, or why banging into walls or your baby brother is so hilarious.

When it comes to arguments I need to have some idea of how to argue with a boy/man. It's like when I get so frustrated with my husband because I just can not see where he is coming from and I shut down, or become defensive, or start yelling, or crying, because I just can't understand him...it's not that I can't...it's just that we think differently; and unfortunately my sons will think like that too.

Sometimes men just dont make sense, and that is what I need the book for.

I know that it is not going to help me make these little robot men that I will be able to completely understand, manipulate and control. ( I don't want that) It may give me some tools, however, to better understand, talk and listen to all the men in my life, so that I dont get defensive, put walls up and maybe have a better relationship with my boys...it's worth a try anyway. :)

Pie for Breakfast

My kids have been known to eat pie for breakfast, as well as a whole host of dessert products...Cinnamon Buns, Strudels, Turnovers, Donuts and the like. It's not because I think that these have any nutritional value in any way, but mostly because some days (like today) I just feel incredibly lazy and can not bother making them eggs, or toast, or pancakes (yet that seems like dessert as well) .

If you look at it that way, pie is actually more nutritious than the other things listed. I mean, look at the pie we had this morning. Apples, figs, a homemade crust...at least it has fruit in it.

I tell my kids that the reason that we had pie was because we are having a backwards day! They seem to get excited and I get off the hook.

I also get to make myself an individual smoothie, which I like much better than breakfast anyway!

Christmas and Kids

I am usually not a fan of family get togethers, as my husband and I are the only ones with children (as we are both the oldest). It's not that our families have any issue with our children, it's that we don't get to sit and chat with everyone, and are constantly trying to keep a handle (literally) on our children.

Christmas however, is considerably better. I think that it may be because the kids are supposed to act like kids. What I mean, is that there are no real expectations on children to act a certain way because Christmas is for children.

Children are expected to be loud, obnoxious, and all around crazy! People like it, laugh, take pictures and on.

This Christmas was great. No expectations, just enjoyment.

I also love the fact that children are what makes Christmas special and magical. That they get so excited over a tiny little toy that you knew they would...you just didnt know HOW excited!!

LOVE watching them open up the paper, ripping it, getting so excited with anticipation.... awesome!

More thoughts on Boys....

A friend's husband was talking to me today at playgroup how there are a considerable amount of girls verus boys being born a year, a number that amounts to 200,000 more girls than boys born in Canada alone...so it got me thinking. Why is it that I am a boy maker?

I really believe in fate, and everything happening for a reason, so there must be a reason why I make boys.

I have been mulling over this for a while and have come up with the following conclusions.

One : I am a very caring and empathetic person, and treat my sons with respect. I encourage sensitivity and problem solving. This will help them to be sensitive and caring dad's when they are older.

Two : I am a huge birth and breastfeeding advocate. Men (unfortunately) have traditionally had more power in politics than women. Perhaps my sons will fight for women's rights in these realms as men as well.

Three : They will also be supportive to their wives. (or else... ;P)

These are just three reasons that I have so far for why I would be given son's to raise....I am sure that I will think of more as the time comes.

Winter Jackets and Carseats.

I live in Canada. Guess what? Baby it is *cold* outside! Recently I have been noticing posts from mothers, blogs, facebook etc. that talk about the dangers of having your child wearing a coat in the winter in the car.

I get it, the jacket is bulky and gets in the way of the seat functioning properly. So the solution is to A) no jacket, B) poncho (polar fleece), C) the car-seat trick (which is still debatable between car seat techs) Here is a thread off CarSeat.org

I guess I am super jaded having an emergency worker living in my house...I think that we can take all the precautions that we could possibly take and it's still not a guarantee that anything will be any better.

If you think about the amount of people that have died in cars over the years by drunk drivers, and the amount of drunk drivers that walk away with out a scratch after being ejected out of their cars it's really incredible. Sad really.

So instead of condemning mothers for using carseats with winter jackets, or thinking that they are knowingly putting their child at harm...maybe just maybe, the car seat tech should sit her ass down outside in -37 Celsius with a wind chill and wait for 15 - 20 mins....I mean if you were to get into an accident and rendered unconscious, how fast do you think the medics are going to get there?? And if your accident was bad enough that you are unconscious do you think you have heaters, and windows protecting your self and kids from the elements...and how fast does a child get hypothermia...

I am not saying we shouldnt be informed, but one size does not fit all and we really can only do the best that WE can.

I mean, I wasnt even in a car seat growing up.....thats progress isnt it?

The Quintessential Hockey Mom

I have always been afraid to be the mom of boys. When my first son was born I was nervous to say the least. Nervous about the extra appendage, the temper tantrums, the "boy" stuff...I was convinced that because I was a girl I would know how to take care of girls.

Once he was born, there wasn't really a learning curve. I really enjoyed being the mom to a little boy. The only downside that I could see was that many of my peers and friends were having girls instead. So finding friends for my son (same sex friends) was tough, but other than that, nothing. When we became pregnant with our second son I wasn't really feeling either way, in regards to having another son, I was happy that my boys would be brothers.

When finding out that I am expecting another son (surprise!!!) this time around, I have to say that I wasn't disappointed...it was a funny feeling actually. I was more upset that I wasn't going to have that relationship that I have with my own mother. Not saying that boys can't have meaningful relationships with their sons, just that I wanted to recreate that relationship with my mom.

After a couple days of processing that I am going to be the mother of 3 boys, I have wondered what is it about being the mom of boys that makes me so nervous.

I have come up with a few things.

First, boys seem to move on when they get married. So I am nervous that I will be left alone. Secondly, women have much more influence on their girls than their boys. My biggest fear is that my boys will end up marrying some girl who parents completely different than me and I will have to watch idly by as my grandchildren are left to cry, or they use corporal punishment or whatever. And who am I to say how some other woman parents their children....even if they are my grandchildren.

Third, and this may be a bit crazy, but I really think that having daughters helps you in the long run. Men can idolize their mothers, and I would like my sons to tell me what they think, without fear of repercussion. It's my opinion that a daughter challenges her mother more and therefore when a mother becomes a mother-in-law, she will be able to handle the rambunctious daughter-in-law better.

Does this mean that the son does not challenge his mother, no not at all....but I do feel that son's tend to "baby" their moms more than daughters.

I guess I am not too excited to be that mom. The one of the three boys in sports, or the aggressiveness...but I am hoping that the way that I parent them will offset that a bit.

Fingers Crossed!

Complete Lack of Motivation

I have stuff to do today, lots of stuff. Laundry, cleaning my kitchen, finishing my bedroom, sorting through more clothes, dishes, a shower, and it goes on....

My issue is this complete and utter lack of motivation. All I am doing is looking at Blog lists, refreshing on Facebook, and checking my email...again and again.

Why? Why am I so unmotivated?

Pregnancy could be a factor, but I slept pretty well last night. Going outside is a huge factor, as I hate the snowy cold wintertime...esp. when it is -30c. Maybe that I am nice and warm in my own house is an issue too....

I am also thinking that it could be the fact that I am reading that Mama Renew book and it is making me drudge up all these emotions and it emotionally drains me. Also, with the other "stress" going on with my life that I just can't seem to let go of.

I was really hoping that my friend would call me yesterday so that I could let go of the AP group for good.

I have re-joined the Mothering dot Commune, which I used to frequent very regularly before becoming a moderator, and with talks of my husband and I relocating, maybe its better that I give myself some space from my community. I just don't feel that it is giving me what *I* need. I don't feel like it is *my* tribe anymore.

I don't really know any of the new people that post on a regular basis, and a lot of the questions are really redundant...I guess that is what happens when you are pregnant with your 3rd baby...sleep, and eating is just something you do.

I would rather spend my time getting more education or writing articles or something that feeds my soul.

Lots to think about anyway.

Self Care

I am reading this book "The Mother's Guide to Self Renewal" I am on the chapter on Self-Care. How we as mothers do not take any time to do things that make us feel renewed or refreshed or whatever. We will forgo our shower if that means that we can do X for our kids, or even skip a meal or two because we are busy with the children.

I was really struck by the amount of time that I spend doing other things, instead of things for my self. One of the questions asked was "What are your top 3 life priorities?" based on what you do, or devote most of your life energy to...for me that would be cleaning my house, spending time on Facebook (working), and chatting with people on the phone about things that shouldn't really matter...at all.

So, I wont call them New Years Resolutions because they always get broken...but I do want to work on taking time for ME for MY family and MY relationships. The ones that are real, not superficial.

As I am entering the stage in my life when I am going to be the mother of 3 children, I need to get my priorities straight, and do things that feed my soul. Things that make life easier and less stressful for my kids, and my husband. Stop trying to make everyone else happy.

I am going to choose maybe 5 friends to concentrate on. The rest will just be on the surface. It's not like that is a bad thing, sometimes surface friends can be the best, because they are ones that you just have a good time with.

I just spend so much time repairing other peoples relationships, making sure that they feel supported, when I feel abandoned at times. (not by everyone)

I just need more me time.

A Matter of Opinion.

I have been butting heads politically the last couple of days, I kind of find it humorous because "pre-kids" I wanted to be a politician. lol. Thank god that my children saved me from that! Anyway, the other funny thing is that it is friend politics and mommy group politics, so politics of the worst kind!! :)

I was trying to explain to a couple people that a respect of legacy is always to be followed when starting a new project, not that one thinks that they need a pat on the back, but a simple "we appreciate what you have done" should always be in order...or that is what I think anyway.

While discussing my viewpoints with another person (who is also a good friend, so this sucks) she said that "You are only one person, and you have opinions, but not everyone has the same opinions." Which is completely true. I do only have my own opinions, and you know what I could really really do without rocking the boat. I am a pretty easy going person and am quite easily satisfied, however, when people come to me and tell me what they are feeling I feel (maybe wrongly) that I should bring it up so that we can be more open and harmonious. So, while people *think* my opinion is my own, it isnt. Not at all. Especially not in the area in question.

The other thing that I wanted to point out, was that yes I have my own opinion, but the same can be said of this person...it is her opinion that my opinion doesnt have any merit. Again, while this may urk me, it doesn't really matter at my core whether or not she agrees with me, because I think that all people have a right to their own opinions, and the world would be super boring if we all agreed on the same thing. (and even best friends have difference of opinion.)

My issue is that she was alluding to the fact that the only people whose opinions matter are those that actively participate in the mommy group via the chat boards, or the in person playgroup. That is where I actually have the issue.

Some people do not participate because it does not give them what they need or what they are searching for. This does not mean that they need to be discounted, far from it. If you are not meeting the needs of all your constituents, then perhaps you should take a survey, figure why not, and fix it. Do not assume that they will just find something new, or a different tribe or something else.

It's kind of like the Birthing organization that I belong to; we learned that the vast number of women who were looking to have a VBAC (vaginal birth after C-section) were feeling unsupported by all levels...we did not assume that they would find a different magazine, or a different organization...we changed our policy to include more VBAC friendly stories and articles, because our mandate is to provide information to all women for an empowered birth.

Same should go with a parenting group who practices "attachment parenting" > which I learn more often than not that the principles that we hold dear and want to instill in our kids, we never ever treat other adults with the same principles.

Pink is the least of the trouble.....

A friend of mine posted a video on Facebook today about the "pinkification" of Girls. You know, pink dresses, shirts, shoes and the like, but also the pink toys that focus on the domestic sphere and the fairy-tale sphere. (princesses, fairies, etc.)

I don't disagree...I do notice that the girls side is completely pink, with a little purple thrown in there just for fun! I also notice that there is tonnes of tulle, make-up, sparkles and the like. What I do disagree with is the statement that the boy's side has more variety.

That is simply not true.

Go to any big box store and while it may *look* like the boys have more variety, they really don't...the boxes are just different colours.

When walking into a big box store and going to the boy side you basically have 4 aisles of selection. They are as follows, Transformers (which signify war and violence), Starwars/Startrek (which also are war/violence), Marvel/DC; Hulk, Spiderman, Batman, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Fantastic Four, Iron Man, (which are also fighting, violence), Trucks, Cars, Ambulances, Fire Trucks etc. (how many cars can one small child have?), and last but not least Nerf. (oh right, guns.)

So basically the aisles are Fighting, Fighting, Fighting, Fighting, Cars, and Fighting. (there are some cars that have gun attached so they squeak by....).

Have you ever noticed how all these toys look the same, just different heads? Like how different is a Transformer, from a Marvel Transformer, to a Marvel Action Figure, to a Starwars action figure, to a Startrek action figure, to a Car...(okay pushing that one... ;P).

So back to the argument that girls have no selection in their toys. Let's see, yes they are all pink, but they have dolls, tea-sets (cant boys play with tea sets?), housewares (can boys clean?), and dress-up clothes that are pretty and sparkly. (yes, boys have play-clothes, but they are 3 types...Ninja, Soldier, or Firefighter.)

The difference is that even a Barbie is an open ended toy. She can do much more than shoot a gun at zombies/monsters/evil scientists/or decepticons. Dolls can allow girls to pretend to be a teacher, a mommy, a midwife or any other sort of person who deals with babies and children. Housewares is completely open ended. They can cook a meal, have a tea party, and interact with language when playing with these toys..."would you like some sugar in your tea?" rather than "DIE Decepticon!! DIE!!"

I just think that once you look past the colour you see that toys that are marketed to girls lead them down a path of empathy and sensitivity, meanwhile boy toys are wrought with violence and ill will. (not to mention gross, and ugly).

So the bigger picture is not the "pinkification" of girls but rather the creation of stereotypical roles within our society for the different genders.

In Search of Sleep.

We don't sleep very well in this family. I can't actually remember the last time one of us got a full eight hours of sleep. I think you just get used to it after a while. Well I do anyway. If I am not waking up myself to pee, then I am getting up to soothe a nightmare, or pat a child back to sleep. I find it really funny that when you are pregnant the first time people tell you, "oh, get sleep when you can"...or after the baby is born they then say "Sleep when the baby sleeps." like it is easy or something.

I just think as parents we just get used to sleep depravation.

Then there is the sleep trainers. They lead parents to believe that babies are supposed to sleep a minimum of 8hrs a day and that just is not true for all babies. Each child is really different and while some are just born good sleepers, others are not.

I think it has more to do with the parent's temperament really. What I mean is that some people are light sleepers and some are not. I know for myself and my husband nighttime is so different for us. My husband wakes up so fast, even for the slightest noise. I, on the other hand can sleep through a 4 year old climbing in my bed, and a two year old trying to twiddle, and a baby nursing through the night. So sleep comes easy for me...and not even that, but I seem to be able to live on much less sleep.

So when people rely on baby trainers I really just think that perhaps they need more sleep than some other person. Some times I think that it's needed, if used in the right way (like not neglecting your child, and checking on them periodically). Is a mother who beats her child, or yells, or whatever because her sleep deprivation is leading to depression, or severe mood swings worse or better than a sleep trainer?

What do you think??

A Second Birthday

My little guy turned two years old today. It's so mind blowing that it was only two years ago that I welcomed him into this world upstairs on my bed.

When you first have a child you expect that your life will be forever changed but you don''t realize just *how* much that it does change. Or how much you learn with every child.

I truly believe that our children are sent to us to teach us something. It could be patience, it could be empathy, understanding, or even how to stand up for your self.

My little guy has taught me that every child is incredibly different no matter how much they look like their older brother. He has also taught me to think on my feet, to let things slide, and to listen to my intuition much more. His older brother was able to tell me what he needed at a very young age and this one makes me do all the work!

He is a very high spirited and energetic boy, who definitely knows what he wants in life and will let you know if he isn't getting it.

I feel blessed to have such a wonderful little man in my life and look forward to watching him live and grow.

Sushi and Pregnancy.

I ate sushi last night. There I said it. I went against the grain and ate my share of glorious california rolls, salmon, tuna, red snapper, a spicy tuna roll, and the like. It was so good.

I am a huge sushi fan and so are my kids, so it is hard for our family to take it out of our diets for a whole 9 months. My kids actually like it, and are well behaved in a Sushi restaurant, so when I get pregnant I mourn for the days that I can go back and have my monthly Sushi infusion.

So last night was payday, and my son's second birthday is this weekend, and we decided to treat ourselves to a meal out. We asked the kids and the bigger one said Sushi. (we know the little one loves it just as much.) So we went.

Once we sat down we noticed that they changed the menu and the cheapest way for a family of 4 to eat was to get the Sushi for 2 and a couple extra avocado rolls.

I have always known of the concern about Sushi, Lunch Meats, Hotdogs, Soft Cheeses etc. So I was a little nervous consuming the fish. But I did. :)

I justified it by saying that women smoke through their whole pregnancy and what is a little bacteria on a fish going to do to me? I mean I haven't even gotten that H1N1 Vaccine as of yet, and that seems to be a much bigger deal.

As I ate each scrumptious piece I felt so guilty, but so satisfied at the same time.

I sat there thinking *why* was it so bad to eat Sushi? I mean, didnt women in Japan eat it everyday? Wouldn't they continue to eat it in pregnancy? My husband commented that perhaps they had the right bacteria in their stomachs to combat the bacteria. But I eat sushi once a month, so I must have that same bacteria. I also thought, maybe it was the mercury? If that was the case, I would just not eat Tuna, or Salmon for a couple months. (but all food is bad, someway or another. See Food Inc. if you don't believe me.)

So then I thought if I got sick I could tell the doctor I ate Sushi and then they would know how to treat it.

I then decided that all this would have been solved with an iPhone, and then put that on my Christmas list.

When I got home I googled, and guess what...I was right, and it is a fallacy. I was actually shocked. I expected to have many articles on just how bad Sushi is, but found that it's actually just one of those things you need to eat in moderation. Sure, bacteria exsits, and so does the mercury, but not in high enough levels in the fish choices I ate, and I live in the suburbs in a city, the restaurant that I chose to eat at is spotless.

You certainly learn something new everyday!

Want to read for yourself? Check out here, here, here and here.

Lastly, douzo meshiagare!!! (enjoy your meal!)

And Letting Go...

I was talking to a friend today about my last blog post. She commented on how the things that make me the most stressed (ie. Organizations that I have my toes in) really don't *need* me. That is true. We have extra people who moderate the parenting group that I belong to, and although there will be a huge transition from the old to the new site and the fact that I am an adminstrator the new website, I dont have to be.

Also, with regards to the non-profit that I belong to, if it makes me crazy instead of inspired, I don't *need* to continue to feel the way I have been feeling.

It's not that I don't know that I am replaceable, because I do. Maybe not at this moment, but if I step down someone else will step up. It's inevitable. The world gives us what we need. :)

I just feel un-heard. Not that people don't hear me, because they do. It's hard not to hear me because I am so incredibly opinionated. But, they don't *hear* me...or I perceive that they don't. Or maybe they hear me, but don't really understand, or see the bigger picture. I have a problem with that one, because I don't like to see people make mistakes, and if they have already been made by me, or by past members of a planning commitee, then it's hard for me to let go of that control and say, "It's okay to let go." "It's okay for people to make mistakes." "It's okay for them to have a different vision." "It's okay to move on." "It's okay."

The hard part for me is letting go, giving up all of the work and effort that I have put into something to allow other people to take it on. It's not that I don't think that others are capable, or that they are not as committed...it's almost like I just need them to acknowledge the importance of another opinion, or the hard work that others have done before them...and perhaps the politics that exist.

I guess this is practice for when my children have grown and I have to let go of them and allow them to continue to grow on their own.

I never view myself as a "Type A" but maybe I really am one.

Women.

I am so tired of the politics that happen with women. So tired. I dont understand why everything has to be such a flipping production. I am actually glad that women are not the leaders of the free world because I think we would spend WAY too long arguing with eachother and not accomplishing anything.

the thing is that every little comment and nuance is examined and over examined and hardly anyone takes anything at face value...or just what it is, and offhanded comment.

Like really, who the heck cares about whatever it is that you do..personally, professionally, with your kids, with your pets, your political views, etc. Why can't we just share information and get on with it.

I just hate having to justify myself over and over and over.

I am just feeling like I am bashing my head on a wall over and over, and am so grumpy....maybe it's just the pregnancy.