And Letting Go...

I was talking to a friend today about my last blog post. She commented on how the things that make me the most stressed (ie. Organizations that I have my toes in) really don't *need* me. That is true. We have extra people who moderate the parenting group that I belong to, and although there will be a huge transition from the old to the new site and the fact that I am an adminstrator the new website, I dont have to be.

Also, with regards to the non-profit that I belong to, if it makes me crazy instead of inspired, I don't *need* to continue to feel the way I have been feeling.

It's not that I don't know that I am replaceable, because I do. Maybe not at this moment, but if I step down someone else will step up. It's inevitable. The world gives us what we need. :)

I just feel un-heard. Not that people don't hear me, because they do. It's hard not to hear me because I am so incredibly opinionated. But, they don't *hear* me...or I perceive that they don't. Or maybe they hear me, but don't really understand, or see the bigger picture. I have a problem with that one, because I don't like to see people make mistakes, and if they have already been made by me, or by past members of a planning commitee, then it's hard for me to let go of that control and say, "It's okay to let go." "It's okay for people to make mistakes." "It's okay for them to have a different vision." "It's okay to move on." "It's okay."

The hard part for me is letting go, giving up all of the work and effort that I have put into something to allow other people to take it on. It's not that I don't think that others are capable, or that they are not as committed...it's almost like I just need them to acknowledge the importance of another opinion, or the hard work that others have done before them...and perhaps the politics that exist.

I guess this is practice for when my children have grown and I have to let go of them and allow them to continue to grow on their own.

I never view myself as a "Type A" but maybe I really am one.