Switch Witch and Buy Backs

I was planning on writing this post next week, but I am going to Blissdom Canada so next weeks posts might be a little more about that and a little less about Halloween. Don't worry though, you can still see what I am doing over at Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest.

It's no secret that my son and I are allergic to dairy. I first became sensitive to milk as a teen and it has escalated from there. My son, on the other hand, showed symptoms of dairy allergy the very first time it was introduced it to him. I then had him checked out by our Naturopath and had the allergy testing formally done.

Being allergic to dairy really sucks. It is in everything. However, as an adult I can suck it up…my son, not so much. He gets really distraught that every "cool" thing has dairy in it. All types of chips (other than natural), all chocolate (unless it is from a health food store), and cookies, cupcakes, crackers and pretty much anything processed. This leads to a really healthy lifestyle, but he pines for the same things that his friends have. Goldfish and Dunkaroos - why cant you have a dairy-free option?!

The Whole Stash

Halloween is especially problematic. I would wager that 80% of the candy given out is chocolate, so to over come this we go twice the distance that we regularly would because when you sort it all out you are left with less than half the stuff they collected…and then when you take out the gross things (like black liquorice and no - name gummy candies) and the Jawbreakers (that they can't have yet), we are left with a 1/6th of the stash.

Non-Milk

Milk Products

Now, obviously my kids are disappointed by this and so we came up with a couple ways so to soften the blow. After we go through all the candy we put half of the castoffs on the front porch for the Switch Witch to come and collect it and leave a toy for them instead. This is such a win-win for us as the kids are happy to give away the candy and I am happy that there are no tears!

Switch Witch to the Rescue!

Here is a great video by Mama Natural about the Switch Witch.




Another thing that we do is go to our local Candy Buy Back. There are many different incarnations of the Buy Back and not all operate the same way. For the most part they are organized by dentists who all have a party the day after Halloween and pay the kids a dollar a pound for their unwanted Halloween candy. (my particular dentist also donates a pound of apples to our local food bank for every pound of candy that collected.)

Isn't he Cute?!

This is great for us because the chocolate bars are going to get thrown out anyway - so does it really matter if it is my dentist's trash bin or mine?

I know a lot of moms like the idea of the Buy Back just not the trash part, and I agree somewhat, but not for the waste of candy, more for the adding to the landfill. My particular dentist made a great YouTube video that shows exactly why they throw out the candy and how they are hoping to convert it into fuel in the upcoming years. That way more families will get on board.

Are you a fan of the Switch Witch or the Buy Back? Or are you completely against them? Share your comments below.

Can the Cupcake or Tips for Sending Treats to School

My Son's Allergy Bracelet

It's that time again, and so the topic of sweets and schools is in the forefront. With allergies and sensitivities at an all time high, many parents do not realize that sending a treat to school can lead to disappointments and tears for a growing number of children (or worse). Who can blame these parents for wanting to send something special for a class party or a birthday? Food is one of those things that has been the center of a community for countless generations.

Switch Witch

Disappointment is something that children with allergies/sensitivities and/or food preferences are just going to have to learn at an early age. As adults we can understand fully what happens when we eat something that we should not, however, children have a real hard time understanding this especially from the ages of 3-7 when being like your peers is a daily goal. Protecting our children from disappointment is easier when they are not in daycare/preschool/school as we control the environment and/or we can distract and/or we can be prepared in advance.  For example, being the "switch witch" at Halloween you can take all the candies that your kids cannot eat and leave a toy in its place, or you can take your children to venues that have goodies that they *can* eat. It is only when the child is asked to do this self-policing that things can get a bit trickier…

As a parent with a child with food challenges here are some ideas to make the early years a bit more manageable:

Can't get any simpler than that. 

1.) Ask the teacher for a list of all the birthdays in the class. Make sure that when they land that your child has a substitute (frozen treat that they can eat) already at the school or send with the child in his/her lunch.

2.) Ask the teacher for a list of all the food sensitivities/allergies and preferences and then sign up to bring a treat and make sure that it does not have any of the trouble foods in it. Tell the other parents so that they know and are aware of the food challenges in class.

3.) Get shirts, pins, bracelets or labels to go on your children’s school items so that all the parents/teachers that see your child will know that they have food challenges. With more education comes more change.

4.) Get involved in your child’s parent council. Especially if your child has a severe allergy. Peanuts are not the only food that can kill a child, and again education is key.

5.) Consider doing a presentation or have a coffee meeting with the parents to let them know that having a heads up when they want to bring treats is preferable… sometimes parents will just keep kids from home, it  can be simpler that way.

As a parent of a child who does not have any food challenges.

Leave the Cupcakes at home.

1.) Try not to send baked goods. As much fun as it is to have the whole class celebrate with your child, baked goods are one of the most common things that all children can not eat. There will always be one child who must miss out. If it is the child with diabetes, the vegan child or the child with a dairy, egg or gluten allergy; one of them will be disappointed when everyone else gets to share in the celebration and they can not.

2.) If you really want to send baked goods, ask the teacher for a list of all the food challenges that are in the class and try to accommodate. The children may not be able to eat it anyway, with all of your efforts as cross-contamination is really easy to happen when baking, and most parents will not let their child take that risk.

Little Tree Crayons

3.) Send stickers, pencils or homemade crayons as a way to celebrate. This way the celebration can last longer than eating a cupcake in 5 seconds flat!! (and I bet the kids will treasure it more!)

4.) Make your child an extra special birthday lunch with their favourite foods. You could also make a themed lunch. Just typing into google-bento lunch and your child's favourite thing can give you a whole host of ideas to try. It will also make your child feel really special – and isn’t that the point entirely?

5.) Save the cupcake for home or the birthday party. A lot of it comes down to the parents of the other children not knowing that a treat is coming so that they can prepare accordingly. If you save the treats for the party the other parents can warn their child or have a substitute.

6.) Send fruit or vegetables. Childhood obesity is on the rise and many children do not get the proper servings of fruits and veggies needed for optimal growth, a celebration day is a great way to get them into children.

We don’t have to take food completely out of celebrations to make everyone happy, but we can choose other things to make it a more inclusionary practice. There are many different ways that we can dress up good allergen free foods to make them fun too. It just takes a little more creativity and some time…time you have when you are not icing 24 cupcakes. 

It's even Vegetarian!

Formula vs Breastfeeding : A rant

This is an response to Breast Feeding vs Formula : A Rant. 


I am getting so tired of this. Blog after blog after blog of formula feeding moms that have to set the record straight about how they feel persecuted by the breastfeeding police. That they were somehow judged somewhere and some how by some horrible LLL leader or "breastfeeding Nazi". (btw - this term is horribly offensive and disrespectful to the people who have survived the holocaust and those affected by it. - more on that later.)


Why is it that when a mom asks for support or encouragement for breastfeeding issues she gets an onslaught of
             
I went through this and eventually had to switch to formula, with both babies, it was very discouraging and I felt like a failure, but sometimes our bodies just can't give our babies what they need. YOu obviously are trying and love your baby and that's what is most important. Keep on trying and if it doesn't work out, know that you tried everything you could, you are still a great mom who wants what's best for your baby!


I have been to various lactation consultants and the LaLeche League. I hate to say this but I found LLL a little judgmental. One of the ladies there told me it's a urban myth that a woman can't produce enough milk. That I just was not committed enough. At that point I decided to try and go it myself. I don't feel like anyone should be judged for the choices they make and are already struggling with on a daily basis.


I know how you are feeling...people make you feel so guilty. My body did not produce enough milk for my Son and I had to supplement since he was losing weight. I found it so exhausting, breastfeeding, then the bottle, then pumping. Then it was time to feed again. At 7 weeks my husband finally said while I was pumping and getting nothing, "Don't feel guilty if you want to stop" After I stopped I enjoyed being a new Mom so much more. My Son is almost 2 now and is a happy healthy boy!


Each one of these posts says that they tried and were *unsuccessful* at breastfeeding. Each one. So, how is that encouraging to the mom asking the question? 


I bring this up because there seems to be a real double standard when it comes to formula feeding moms and moms who use breastmilk.  Now I would argue along with The Feminist Breeder that formula feeding is not necessarily a "choice"… but lets argue for a moment that you think it is. One *chooses* to feed formula and one *chooses* to feed breastmilk. Okay. Now, why is it that when ever there is a question on breastfeeding it is taken as an excuse to explain how hard it is and how formula *saved the baby's life* but a breastfeeding mom can't be proud of her accomplishment? Does that somehow make her judgemental of a formula feeding mom? Just because she succeeded at getting milk to come out of her breasts?? 


Another question was posed on Today Moms facebook page asking about how long people had exclusively breastfed for, and what helped them, and what could have helped them even more…. the responses again were not very supportive of breastfeeding…. 


Some babies just don't take to it well and at the end of the day the health and well-being of your child should be more important than you being able to say you exclusively breastfed.



Nothing would have helped. I never lactated at all, not even colostrum. Fortunately, I didn't have any stupid hang ups about it and happily gave my kids formula.


I really wanted to breast feed but from day one my daughter wasn't having it. Pumping is just not the same and doesn't produce milk the same way if that's all your doing. I pumped for about two months then went all the way to formula.


 I did it for 3 months. Never had enough due to death threatening complications when I had my daughter. So I'm VERY thankful for bottles and "the fake powder stuff" like Amy calls it. Two centuries ago my daughter and I would've been dead if it not were for the advancements in medicine.


Are we noticing a trend yet?? 


And then to the Blog in question. This particular blog was written in response to a twitter party with a formula manufacturer giving away free swag being shut down because they were afraid of the backlash from the "lactivist" community. (doesn't that say something right there? The formula company cancelled it on their own because they were afraid of what exactly??)


Anyway, this mom, felt the need to post because she felt that the moms who *choose* formula should get free swag too. (and sure, yes they should). But, the thing is that formula companies are horrible in their marketing practices and they don't really care about you once they have gotten you - I mean just look at the recalls…. they want that NEW mom. That mom who is struggling and LOOKING for SUPPORT - and then they swoop in on their white horse and give her a free sample and *save her baby's life*. 


How is that ethical? 


And so blog posts standing up for the *choice* of formula and saying things like - "You don’t think it crosses our mind that, if it weren’t for formula, our babies would die? Do you think that feels good?"  …are just lining the pockets of the food giants.


What about milk sharing, or milk banks?? (but that is another post entirely).


So when a mom who is really only invested in the health and wellness of another mother and child - mental health as well, has NO ulterior motive…no bottom line…they get mud slung at them - 


unfreakingbelievable. Seriously? And what would these breast milk nazis have done for MY children, when my breast milk didn't contain enough fatty nutrition and I was forced to use formula so that my kids didn't starve to death? When the hell will self righteous bitches learn to mind their own damn business, take care of their own brats as opposed to telling us how to take care of ours? I'm with you on this one, T. This is god damn INFURIATING.



What is infuriating to me is that it seems like if you formula feed you can pretty much say whatever you want and not really get held accountable. You can call activists "Nazis" and it is socially acceptable… You can make a societal issue all about you and not really understand the politics and money behind the issue and blame it all on judgement. 


Basically, you can run your mouth about support and judgement and then turn around and do the EXACT same thing to a mom who is wanting to or actually breastfeeding…. 


Why can we not see the hypocrisy here and why do we allow it to continue?? 


If you truly *chose* to formula feed. i.e.) had an adequate supply of milk, a ton of support, no issues at all and THEN decided that you wanted to formula feed for convenience - as this is the ONLY way that I think it is actually a *choice* then seriously. OWN YOUR CHOICE - and don't feel guilty or defensive because it was YOUR CHOICE.


And moms that tried to breastfeed but could not for whatever reason. Get angry at the medical professionals who failed you. Get angry at your genetics. Get angry at our society for not supporting you. Get angry at the formula companies that undermined you at every turn… but STOP taking it out on other mothers who tried and for whatever reason were lucky at it. Praise them. Look up to them…you wanted to breastfed right? you tried right?? so why the hate for those who made it? 


Stop with the judgement, the name calling and defensiveness…if you want support, start giving it. 




ps. before you start to throw mud at me - my first born was formula fed - and guess what?? He is not *fine*. He has allergies, sleeping issues, and hyperactivity tendencies…. hmmm…the anecdotal evidence didn't work there did it? 

Sanctimommy

When most people post about Sanctimommies they are talking about me.

Someone who Co-Sleeps (doesnt CIO), Babywears (every day all day), Births at Home, Breastfeeds well into toddlerhood, delayed or selective Vaccination, eats Organic. (or as organic as I can do at the moment), Homeschools (oooh..that is a new one!) etc. etc. etc. etc.

Oh wait! And the pinnicle is that they tell other people about thier way of life.... guilty.

But here is the thing. I dont really care if you used CIO, wear a Bjorn or use a Stroller, Fed Formula because you think that it is better than Breastmilk. I dont care if you had an Elective C-Section, Vaccinated right on Schedule or Eat at McDonalds every other week. I honestly do not care nor wish to change your mind if you are happy for all the decisions that you have made while rearing your young child. Honestly.

It does not affect me or my family.

I can say that with my hand on my heart. We are all different people who do things for different reasons, I don't judge you, and you don't judge me....right?

Wait...well maybe I do judge...because there is ONE thing...one itty bitty thing that makes me want to run up to another parent and slap them accross the face with thier own childs hand....you want to know what it is?? Something that DOES affect me and my family....

RESPECT!

I have been to MANY MANY a playground this summer, at all times of the day and I have noticed (and so have my kids) a growing populace of young tweens (8-15 yrs of age) at the playground alone (and you Free Rangers would LOVE this), but its not all make believe and fun play.

Its blatent, hurtful, un called for Bullying.

"I am going to kill you if you touch the swing"

"I am going to hit you if you go on the slide"

"EWWW! You kissed your brother! You are GAY!"

"I don't like you"

"I am not going to play with you"

Screaming, "Its our Ball, Get OVER it!!" to a 3 year old....

and then when confronted, by this overzealous sanctimommy, "That is RUDE. You will NOT talk to my children in that manner." I get, sheepish, "sorrys" and "I was only jokings"

So moms. There it is.

Teach your kid some RESPECT and all will be right with the world.