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Thursday, January 13, 2011

Confessions of a Lazy Mom

As of late I have seen many different blog posts and Facebook statuses of moms telling WHY they choose to do something one way or the other way. A lot of these posts pertain to the AP or "attachment parenting" way, or as it is now being called "instinctual", "intuitive" or "natural" way of raising children.
What gets my goat up is when these mommy bloggers extoll the virtues of their way, or that it is the "best" way of raising children....not that it is just a different way. I don't understand why they have to "defend" their position.
So, I have decided to come out of the closet and tell you how I started to "AP". It's because I am the laziest parent you will ever meet.

Breastfeeding : Which is easier?
1. Popping a boob into the mouth of a hungry 4 month old and going back to sleep, or
2. going to the store, finding formula, buying the right bottles,
sterilizing said bottles, walking down the hallway at 4am to mix the formula, feed the
baby, burb the baby and then have to wash the bottles and start all over again?

Having said all that, I did have to use bottles and formula for my first born as we had an uphill battle with establishing nursing for the first 6 months, but I can tell you that while nursing my 2nd and 3rd with no issues Breastfeeding is the easier choice. Convenient, less work, and way way more sleep.

CoSleeping/Bed Sharing : Which is easier?
1. Laying down with the baby when you get tired and nursing them to sleep and falling asleep yourself, and when they wake up, pulling them close and popping said boob...or
2. Rocking, shushing, bouncing, nursing, to sleep, trying to transfer, having them wake up 20 mins later to start all over again, waking in the middle of the night, having to get out of bed and walk down the hallway to get the baby to sleep and then come back to your own bed exhaused to start all over again an hour later?

I absolutely started bedsharing with my kids because I did not want to have to walk down the hallway and go and get them. It was so much easier for me just to roll over, comfort them and go back to sleep. Sure there is a safe way of cosleeping and of course I need to highlight it, and funny enough people who do feed children formula should not...but for me and the fact that I was nursing through the night, it saved me HOURS of sleep. This was not at all about lowering the risk of SIDS, about regulating body temperature, or for was all because I am way to lazy to get out of bed in the middle of the night.

Babywearing: Which is easier?
1. Having a baby content and sleeping on you or
2. Holding your baby all day until your arms feel like they are going to drop off, or trying to get the baby calm and then putting them down, only to have them cry and have to pick them up and do this over and over and over again, or have to buy so many batteries for all the devices that they now make to give us some reprieve for our sore arms?

I think I became a babywearer the first time I tried to pee while holding my son. It's true. He had fallen asleep while nursing and I didnt want him to wake up when I tried to transfer him so I thought, how hard can it be to pee holding something that weighs 10lbs? HARD. Getting my pants around my ankles wasn't the hard part, it was pulling them back up...with one hand...and dont even get me started on the button. I know, I know, too much information...but seriously, it was the hardest thing ever. Put that baby in a wrap however (mind the tails) and you can do ANYTHING! Anything. With two hands the possibilities are endless!! You can eat steak!! You can cut it yourself!! (I also babywear with wraps because they are cute...but that is another blog post.)

There are many more things that I do because of my laziness...but that is for another day. (the kids are bugging me to play!!) :)


Deb said...

Great post. I think my reasons for APness can largely be attributed to laziness as well.

Reading your comment about eating a steak dinner while babywearing reminded me of a time I actually put a napkin over my sleeping baby's head so that I wouldn't drop crumbs on him while eating...

akathemom said...

hahahahaha so very true!!!

Kelly said...

"gets my goat up" LOL!

I've totally peed with a baby in my arms (not nursing or asleep, though)! Even in a public washroom once, it was awful!

MP said...

Awesome post!

My beginnings into AP'g was similar.
exhaustion + BF'g with supplementary bottles + crying + high needs Baby led to cosleeping.
It was the only way I could get enough sleep to find a state of functionality the following day.

Once we were onto exclusively breastfeeding I was hooked. Yeah, I suppose my MIL would have called it laziness if she had known about it but who cares...I was starting each new day as well rested as I could be. What she didn't know, didn't hurt her and wasn't a source of contention when we did see/talk to her. Much to her disbelief I just couldn't grasp the superiority of Dr.Spock parenting 101.

Cosleeping led to babywearing & then all the other wonderful AP benefits fell into place too.

When my son arrived and didn't like to cosleep I remember thinking. What?! Are you kidding me? In the end Momma got as much sleep as she could by only transferring him to the cosleeper when he wouldn't settle. Yup lazy. ;0)

Now that little boy is 8yo and needs the family bed. Momma says o.k.! Poppa bear is the one now saying: You've got to be thrash & kick all night long!

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