India - The History

Growing up in Canada I have always felt that we are lacking on the history part. Sure we are all immigrants (apart from the First Nations ) but for the most part Canada's real history is only a couple hundred years old. I think that this may be the reason why I am so amazed to see other countries that have and celebrate vast histories that have spanned not only decades but centuries.

India, of course, did not disappoint. We visited 6 different cities in the course of 15 days and every one of them was filled with so much history that we were barely able to get it all in.

Humayun's Tomb - Delhi

Most of the architecture that we saw was built in the 16th century by two men. Two great Mughal kings.

My husband was most interested on where the building materials came from, how they were designed and how all the elaborate stonework was executed. I, on the other hand, was interested in the people behind the buildings. Why they would build these amazing forts and palaces and wondered what they looked like in their glory days.

Agra Fort

Me at the Taj

You would think that going to India that my favourite monument would be the Taj Mahal, but you would be wrong. I do think that it is a marvel, and a wonderful thing that should be seen if you decide to go to that part of the world. Beautiful white columns, symmetry, inlaid art like you have never seen before, and a serenity that washes over you in a city of millions of people. One thing that I found to surprise me about the Taj is that I always knew that it was a mausoleum dedicated to a kings wife; but i never realized that it was a Muslim monument. I mean, looking at it now, obviously it is. It looks just like the palace from Aladdin! What I learned on this trip is that all that beautiful black scroll work on the face of the Taj are all scriptures from the Quran. This is a significant thing, as Hindus and Muslims do not typically agree on most things - but they tolerate each other. And the fact that a country that is mostly Hindu has a Muslim monument as their #1 visited tourist destination shows you just how proud Indians are of their shared heritage.

The Muslim Wife's Celing

My most favourite historical site that we visited was Fatehpur Sikri which is just outside of Agra. The reason behind this was because the king that built this palace was a very political king. Our guide told us that he had three wives to make the people happy. A Hindu wife from Jaipur (arranged marriage), a "Christian" wife to show how progressive he was to the British (Christian is in quotations as it is believed that she was actually a Muslim) and a Muslim wife. I asked our guide which of the three wives was his favourite (you know, the one who got the most attention). Our guide laughed and said that I was the first one to ask him this, and that many people believed that it was the Hindu wife as she had the biggest palace. (The king and queens all had separate "palaces" within the compound.) The Hindu queen's palace was three stories and had it's own temple. It was twice as big as the Christian wife's and three times as big as the Muslim wife's. However, our guide asked us to look closely at each palace and to notice the differences. All three were very spectacular, but the one room Muslim queens was the MOST spectacularly carved and decorated. It was also the one closest to the King's bedroom...coincidence? I think not!

Ghandi's Cremation Site

If I was to take away one thing from visiting all of these heritage sites it would be that I do not know enough world history. We also visited the house that Mahatma Ghandi lived in, and we saw where he was cremated. But until I went to India this time I had no real understanding of why he was who he was. I mean, I knew that he was an important figure and someone to be admired, but I did not know the whole story. I am going to make sure that I learn more and teach my kids more in years to come.

The most interesting part about seeing the historical side of India was that as a tourist, the history is all that people want you to see. We saw fort after fort, palace after palace and memorial after memorial. We saw "old" India and if we had not visited Delhi we would have thought that India was the same as it was years ago, slowly moving forward...however, we visited a mall on the last day and it was EXACTLY like a North American mall. EXACTLY. Even the same stores.

New Delhi Mall

In another post I am going to touch on the political and social climate that we witnessed which also touches on this phenomena.

I could honestly write four more posts on the history as it is so rich and vibrant, but it really is something that you have to experience for yourself.

India - The Prequel

Hindu Temple

When you tell people that you are going to India they get really excited. I think it's because it is one of those exotic far-away destinations that almost everyone has on their bucket list. Maybe it's because it is so far away, or maybe because there is something for everyone. They have a rich history, amazing food, an incredible culture, nice weather, and spirituality that encompasses the whole country.

While we were travelling we saw tourists that fit in every one of these categories. Families there for the sun, backpackers there to experience the "real" India, older tourists visiting all the heritage sights, and many many people dressed in what I would consider yogi, or simple clothes following a spiritual path that only they and their god(s) knew of.

For many people India is a world that is full of mystery, and wonderings. It is so far removed from our western culture that it gets romanticized in our movies and media. You hear again and again from people who have been there that India is not a destination, but rather an experience. And, it was. However for me, it was not an experience that people would assume - you see it was not my first time to India, and going back coloured my experience in more ways than even I expected.

12 year old me

When I was 12 years old my parents and my three siblings moved to Kota, Rajasthan. My dad was working with the Canadian and Indian governments on a project and so my grade 6 year we moved from Canada into a 6 bedroom house in the outskirts of a little town in north west India. We had many servants, a cook and a nanny. (her name was Shanti) It sounds like it was glamorous or something but my parents are not like that at all. We had to have the servants as it was expected that a western family would have them.  Honestly though, my mom had 4 kids under 12 in a foreign country with no support so I think she enjoyed the help at least a little. We were not the only family that lived in Kota, as the project was quite big. I was lucky enough that there was another girl my age and we made fast friends the first day of "school". All the children on the project were homeschooled, but we also went to school with a teacher who made sure that we kept on track with curriculum.

A Holy Cow

I can't really sum up that year except to say that THIS was the experience that people talk about. I think that it would have been the same had we gone to any third world country. I was an adolescent girl who was  acutely aware of myself. Incredibly self conscious and even more so as I was one of 40 or so families that were white. People noticed me. All the time. They looked, stared, and gestured. People smiled and were curious...and I, who has always been an extrovert, was incredibly shy. This was the one year of my life that I feel I took a backseat and WATCHED instead of jumping right up to the front as I usually do - even to this day.

The reason behind this is because I was a complete outsider. Not only did I not speak the language, but I was also a girl (becoming a woman), and at that time women were expected to act differently than they would be in North America. I had to learn new ways to carry myself, to talk to elders, to men, to my brothers. Having always been the oldest in my family, it surprised me when people would comment on how I must pay so much respect to these two little brats that made my life miserable, how there were celebrations for them, how I was to respect them. I can't really explain what it is like to grow up in a culture with such freedom for women and girls, and then living within another one that marginalizes them.

Experiences are the things that shape you. I credit India for shaping me.

When I came back to Canada I was again the outsider. Of course it was Jr.High, but how can one girl go back into the social pecking order that is adolescence when her whole idea of the world is vastly different than that of all her classmates?

I had felt racism directed at me. I had felt inequality in my soul. I saw true poverty with my own eyes. True desperation, and real suffering. I had witnessed squalor, filth, hopelessness and death. But I had also witnessed understanding, compassion, joy, and a work ethic like no other. This changes you, especially if this happens in those formative years when you are just learning about yourself. My experience made me more compassionate, more empathetic, and more understanding of all people around me. It also made me incredibly grateful for the life that I have been so lucky to be born into - that of a middle class Canadian woman.

Wearing a Sari as an Adult

And yes, India was amazing. I will share what I learned this time around in a series of posts. I am not sure how many I will do as this one wasn't really supposed to go into this direction - but I have a feeling none of them will since it is about a country that has touched my very soul.

The Blissdom Canada 2012 recap

Well, I am back from Blissdom Canada 2012. Did you miss me? I promise that I will get back to my regular blogs about Halloween on Thursday (and then some!)

I had a great time in Toronto, and better still my kids had a great time without me! My house is clean, I am renewed and refreshed and I got to spend the weekend with 500 other women (and a handful of men) that speak my language.

Love Marilyn!

Sitting in the Chair! My dream!!

I came in early for the conference as I won tickets to the Marilyn Denis show. This was a dream come true for me. I have been watching Marilyn for years with my mom and so to see her live and get to talk with her one on one was so great. She gave me a big hug and I got to sit in her chair…it's the little things you know….

Town Hall

Spent the rest of the day just walking around the city. It is SO big, and so so much faster paced than Calgary. I have to say that I actually got quite overwhelmed and had to retreat back to the hotel just to have a little quiet time. I love the city, but it also scared me at the same time.

Not even a 1/4 of the mall!!

That night I was waitlisted for the Road Rally (think Amazing Race), but in the end I got to go. (thanks Brooke!) We ran around Toronto being chauffeured by our wonderful driver Patrick and took many different pictures, videos and tweeted the whole time. It was so crazy and I am glad that all 3 of my team mates were from Toronto (lucky that way).

Next was the kick off party where we had Microsoft show us some neat things and I watched many women dance the night away with the Kinect dance challenge. (it was pretty funny)

It was at this party that I met Annie of PhD in Parenting. I felt like such a nerd and fan girl, but she was so nice and made me feel right at home. (thanks to Mara for introducing us - and thanks to Candace for showing me that she was there.)

Annie and I

Ann and I

Saturday was the first real day of the conference. It started with a welcome breakfast and we had a presentation by Dove. Next we had 3 micro-sessions to talk about things that we really wanted to learn.
The micro-sessions were by far my favourite part of the conference. I learned about analytics with Annie, How to Be an Expert with Candace, and How to Write a Book with Ann Douglas.

After lunch we had the opportunity to listen to the keynote speakers. While all of the talks were amazing in their own right, my favourite by far was Bonnie Stewart. Here is a post that she wrote that has some of the key ideas of that talk. It is something that we really have to take to heart as the internet is really just an extension of us in the real world and we must always be aware of that.

Jian and I

I was able to get my book signed by Jian Ghomeshi, the Sh*tty Moms, Andrea Nair, and by Amy McKay. (Bliss for a book lover like myself.)

So cute!!

Saturday evening my blogging girlfriends and I went to get our hair done and we dressed up as Mad Men Women for the karaoke costume party. We had planned this group costume for over two months and it was great to see it in action! It was too fun and I looked so cute! I could be a 1950's housewife every day! The party also gave me an opportunity to connect with other really neat people. I met Kyla from MommysWeird and I swear we were best friends in another life! I love this conference for stuff like that!

Hope I don't crash!!

The next day I went to the GM plant in Oshawa and learned all about the new technology that they are putting into their cars. It was pretty neat to see the "behind the scenes" and I really like how they listen to the consumer. I actually talked to them about integrated carseats and they discussed it with me. My favourite new feature that they showed us was that they have sensors that see the lines on the road and if you go over the line it vibrates your seat to alert you. How neat is that? I think it is for rumble strips (since there is talk about getting rid of them due to cyclist commutes).

Pretty Sweet!

I got to drive a Camaro (a new souped up edition) and do a slalom course, a doughnut course, and a fast breaking course. It was pretty neat and I joked with the drivers if they knew the Stig (since they all spoke french).




After the excursion was over we were whisked VIP style back to the airport to await our (delayed) flight to Calgary. The drive was great and I have to note that out of all the sponsors at Blissdom, GM were my favourite as the always had cars and drivers waiting for people, and if you were from out of town like me, that service was really invaluable.

My Ride

I learned a lot, not only about Social Media, Marketing, Books and Branding, but also about myself. I learned that I need to really look deep inside of myself and see what I want to do, apart from being a mother and a wife, and to take more time just for myself.

My kids survived, my house survived, my husband is capable.

Blissdom Canada 2013?? I think so.

Calgary all the way to Winnipeg

5 mins into the Epic Journey

In my last two blog posts I explained that my husband and I were taking our 3 sons across Canada in an epic 5 day roadtrip to get to the cottage. I explained how to pack your suitcase to save time and stress and also what to pack for entertainment in the car. Make sure that you check them out if you haven't already.

The thing is that we actually didn't take the full five days - we gunned it and made it in 2 and a half. (no speeding).

We started the trip early at about 6am leaving our house in the far south of the city of Calgary and of course we had to go back not once but twice to double check and grab last minute forgotten items...we then stopped at our local Starbucks to grab coffee and a chai (a must need for early mornings in our family) and finally set off at about 7am.

Where is Dora?!

Our first stop and pee break was at Medicine Hat where we saw the "largest" tpee in the world. My middle son was incredibly disapointed that it wasn't the largest TV as we had promised. After being thoughougly unimpressed we continued on until we hit Moose Jaw.

The Front of the Moose - on purpose! 

I remember seeing that moose as a child but thinking that it was much bigger than it actually was. We lined up the kids for the obligatory tourist picture and my oldest commented that the moose had gigantic testicles!! (the funny part is that I remembered noticing that as a kid too - why exactly does a plaster moose need them? - especially when it is missing its penis)

We got back on the road and headed to Regina. By the time we entered the city it was only 3 o'clock and the thought of staying in a hotel and waiting until the kids fell asleep at 10pm (at the earliest) was more petrifying than just continuing on. I called the hotel to cancel our reservation and we continued on to Manitoba.

Cute little grain elevators in Saskatchewan.

We made a quick pit stop for a pee and a bag of chips in a small town 2 hours out of Brandon. The kids had the DVD player on by this point and we were listening to episode after episode of Ninjago. I am not a huge fan of media for my kids but in this case the quiet was worth it. We powered through to Brandon Manitoba and stopped for our final break at the Quiznos on the highway.

I know that I have said before that we are vegetarians, but more of the problem with food is actually the cheese. Both my oldest son and I are allergic to dairy and so most vegetarian options are out fr us when travelling. We decided to just get turkey subs for the kids so there would be some protien and I grilled the clerks on what was vegan and what wasn't. I think that they may have thought that I was speaking a completely different language. By this time my husband had really had it and we had been driving for over 15 hours. I told the clerks as much and tried to get the kids fed and to the bathroom with as little drama as possible. There may have been some tears and some sharp words exchanged.... But this being the one time people were showing signs of stress we decided to put the kids jammies on and make a reservation in a hotel in Winnipeg.

15 hours in the van and he is still smiling.

It got dark rather soon after we started driving again and the kids were really unhappy that we had turned the DVD player off and rudely expected them to go to sleep. (sleep?! What is that?!)

In classic kid fashion both the littles fell asleep an hour outside of Winnipeg and I bribed the oldest to be quiet with a "surprise" for the trip in the morning. We pulled in, took the dog for a pee, my husband took the bags and the dog and the oldest and put him to bed and came back down to help carry child #3 while I carried #2.

We made it!!! 

We walked as fast as we could through the lobby, prayed that the elevator didn't wake them. Put them into their beds and as quiet as mice we slipped out of our clothes into our pjs and crept in beside them.

We work really well as a team in instinces like that. (any other time - not so much).

Stay tuned for the second part of this blog - Winnipeg to Sault Ste. Marie.


***update - since it was a crazy trip there and an even crazier trip back - the second day is all blurry so not sure when I will be able to blog about it***

How to Pack for a Roadtrip - Part Two

In my last post I explained how I packed the suitcase for our 5 day trek across Canada. Today I am going to talk entertainment. 3 kids, all boys, 7, 4 and 2 stuck in a van for a minimum of 6 hrs a day to a maximum of 10…you need to be prepared! (addendum *we ended up driving right through so it was 3 days with a minimum of 5 hours to a maximum 18 hours *)

1. Go shopping in your house first.

Nothing new is in this picture.

You can be surprised about how much stuff you can find in your own craft room (or cupboard). Pipe cleaners, pom poms, crayons, paper, beads and the like can be used for various activities and will save you time and money that you can put towards other parts of our vacation.
Many moms will pick up books when they are on sale and then put them away for a rainy day. A rainy day or a full day in the car are basically the same thing. Use up old workbooks, activity books, colouring books, even pull out the pages if it is half done. You can make up your own activity books by using these pages and a stapler. Put crayons or markers into a sandwich bag and also connect it to the book with a staple or a ring, this will help immensely in the car or van.

2. Pack supplies separately.

Separate Bags

Count how many days that you are going and think about how many hours that you will be in the car each day. With any road trip there are long days and there are short days, so for the long days make sure that you have more things in that particular bag. Since we went on a 5 day road trip I packed 6 different bags filled with colouring books, toys, etc. Check out this vlog to see some examples. The reason why I packed 6 bags was because the last bag was full of the emergency stuff that came out in the last hour of the road trip when all other things had been used and thrown on the floor in frustration. Make sure when the kids are done playing with the item that you put it back into a bag and then put it away for the trip back or for another day.

3. Make sure you have novel items that you know they really enjoy.

Ninjago, a Starwars Fan, Non-Spill Bubbles and a flash toy.

At the beginning of each day give the kids a new item like a book, or something to colour etc. If they start to act out, or become bored take a pee break, or a snack break and try again. If they really seem bored bring out a novel item and you should be able to get another hour out of them. I let my kids pick a couple toys that I wouldn't regularly buy and then saved them for when the started to get squirlley.

4. Use your imagination - or theirs.

Distraction is really key when it comes to long road trips and if you find that the kids are melting ask them to see if they can see a cow, or a semi truck or a piece of scenery and ask them about it. Kids want your attention on a good day and even more when trapped in a car. Play "I spy", or make up silly songs, or even get each person to say one sentence of a story and see how long you can go.

5. Don't rely too heavily on electronics.

Must Haves.

Notice that I didn't say not to use them. Electronics in the car are really great to make it through a rough patch. We had a rule that the DVD player did not come on until after lunch. We would wake up at 5am and get on the road by 6am. We would have lunch by 1pm and if the kids seemed like they needed a bit of a break we would let them watch a movie that they had never seen before. It worked really well for us. (we also chose movies that we knew they would really like).

6. Use the trip as part of the vacation.

We visited Winnie the Pooh!

Depending on how your kids are you could use the road trip as part of the vacation. Many little towns and big cities have really interesting points of interest and really cool playgrounds to check out. Do your research before hand and see what is available. You could also use the information of the places you visit as a history lesson. Kids love to see these kitchy things and any opportunity to stretch your legs is a good one. Of course, if you are insane like us you may decide just to drive through if your kids are in good spirits. (we went from Calgary, Alberta to Sudbury, Ontario in 2 nights 3 days)

7. When all else fails….

In case of Emergency.

You know your kids best. I brought Jelly Belly's and gave them out whenever the littlest was having a meltdown. I am not a big fan of candy for a little guy like him, but it distracted him until we made it to the next town. I also programmed my iPod with games that the kids would like to play. This is a road trip and a vacation and sometimes you just have to think on your feet! We also have stopped at a walmart to get the kids out and buy a new little lego set - just because we knew that it would keep them happy until the next stop.

This system really works well for us. Another couple tips that I would suggest is pack a lot of snack foods (healthy) and make sure that you feed and water your kids regularly. I gave my oldest son his own cooler and packed it each morning so that he could help himself and I would not have to throw granola bars at him in hopes that he would catch them. (hoping that they wouldn't fall to the floor)

Great Investment.

Speaking of not dropping things on the floor... The last tip I would say is to get some thing for them to put on their lap. We bought the Star Kids Travel Trays and they were really invaluable. I was able to pack all of the items for the day (keeping a couple really special things up front with you.) That way you can also place all the other bags in the seat backs or in the trunk to free up your floor space.

Road trips are a great way to make precious memories for your family. Do you have any tips or tricks that your family does to make it more enjoyable for the whole family?